Online poker insults

I went back to UB despite the Absolute Poker scandal (Absolute is another site and the company that bought UB) where a former executive was using a superuser account to see opponents' holecards. Not much in poker is ironclad, even, actually especially, the integrity of the game. The thing is, I get rakeback at UB, and if I play online without getting rakeback I am leaving too much money on the table.

I withdrew my money from Full Tilt and used some Full Tilt points to play a single table tourney, the winner of which got into another tourney. I won the single table and then cashed in the tourney.

Online poker chat is like the drainage bin of public discourse. You get these frustrated individuals not even playing cards who are online just to fuck with people. I don't talk smack to anyone w/o provocation. With a 9-to-1 chip lead in the single table tourney, a guy pushed all-in and I called with 93 suited because of pot odds. He types in, "Great read moron," tabling J4. I turn the flush and type, "ty come again" and he unleashes a barrage of vile. The cool part is that he has been eliminated so his chat is now in a different color. It's in an off brown, instead of in blue like before. I think most players on ftp have at some time relished the bitter brown type of a guy they just busted.

Value shoving air

Carolina John aka DJ Johnny has a new blog that's mostly about his sicko daytrading exploits. He said if he was doing well enough, he would take a shot at a bigger game next time he's in Vegas (T-giving), and he is doing great so far, so all I have to say is, "Welcome to the Bellagio, Sir. Can I tell you about our high hand jackpot?"

In my second-to-last post I linked to some hands showing how some guys can play so badly against me and still get rewarded. So to be fair and balanced I expose myself value shoving with queen high.

And with jack high.

I guess you could argue about them being bad plays but definitely high variance and probably -EV plays against calling stations, and I was tilting at the time.

So value shoving with air reminds me of Bill Fillmaff's famous "I value call my nuts." If you haven't watched the vids on this site, they are Hellmuthian spoofs but I only recommend downloading the Chapter 1 vid as the others get lame.

TTYLFTP

I've been playing on Full Tilt and yesterday I got in the black for October. That was nice considering I lost $1,200 in about two seconds of live play to begin the month and then lost more online.

I made a withdrawal request of Full Tilt poker and was surprised that it came back declined. I've made about a dozen Full Tilt withdrawals in the past six months. They no longer have phone support so I emailed them to find out what was up. They told me my account was suspended for having multiple accounts.

Some background: About a year ago I made a second Full Tilt account in addition to my original "Highwaytime" account on Full Tilt. The second account was called ElHajjh, and I set it up because I wanted a rakeback account. A rakeback account is where you get a percentage of the house take, or rake, taken by the site by setting up an account through an affiliate of the poker site. But when I tried to withdraw using ElHajjh, they told me I couldn't have multiple accounts. So I withdrew my balance and closed both accounts. Then a month later I set up a new account under "SevenCities." I spoke to Full Tilt staff on the phone who told me that this wasn't going to be a problem since this new account did not coexist with any other existing account of mine. And since then I've made lots of withdrawals from that account.

So today I explained all of this in emails to Full Tilt but to no real avail. They say they will reopen my original Highwaytime account if I want but will not let me play under any other screen name. I told them to just cash me out, so now I'm waiting for them to send my money to EPassporte and considering where to take my business.

I have a rakeback account on UltimateBet, but that site is owned by Absolute Poker and I don't want to go there right now for obvious reasons. I think I'm headed to PokerStars.

So tilted...

I hoped my bad run wouldn't carry over to online play. And it's true that my opponents on FullTilt have been trying really hard to give me money. But they're usually not succeeding.

Here's a great hand against a player whom the Russians might say has been "touched by the angels."

And another against the same guy.

A hand against a player who wanted to gamble for 300 big blinds preflop with Ace-rag.

By God, why not??? Why not, I say!!! Just instantly go all-in over the top on the turn.

Checkraise with nothing on the flop and then call for all your chips on the turn.

If you didn't know K6 was the nuts, you better axe somebody. I may be about to...the progress of my bankroll has been SLOW.

"Wow, I'm not even mad! I'm amazed!"

So the past week has been the roughest stretch I've had in live action poker. It was bad karma for me to boast two entries ago how I couldn't lose. That's where I went wrong. Especially the past three days have been brutal, where I've played about 12 hours a day. It's been a mix of being hideously card dead ("have you tried these new flop-resistant cards?") combined with disaster striking on the rare ocassions I've made a hand. Never once did I see pocket aces in that time, and the three times I made sets I was shown a better hand on the river. Once I saved some money when I folded my set face-up on the river and as a courtesy my opponent showed his made gutshot. The second time I was up against top pair with a backdoor flush draw and it went runner-runner diamonds. On the very last hand of cards I played, I flopped middle set on a J72 board and got all my money in on the flop in a three-way pot to see a final board of J72JJ, so I got counterfeited to a higher pocket pair.

So I'm not gonna go on and on about this. Just trust me that it has been pretty remarkable. If it wasn't happening to me, I would be fascinated by it the same way a mathematical wave theorist could be fascinated by watching a huge aberrant wave develop, as they sometimes do, in the middle of the ocean, in calm waters. Right now, like Will Farrell in Anchorman after Baxter ate the whole wheel of cheese, "I'm not even mad, I'm just amazed.

Quick Update

I've played a lot of PLO in the last six months but rarely found myself a 62.5% favorite over a set when I have nothing and there's one card to come.

Todd won the Sunday tourney at his new home base casino in Tucson, AZ. He tipped "a dollar for each dealer involved." This would be a good time to mention that Carolina John's mom, when she won the 2 pm tournament at Planet Hollywood, tipped $500 out of an $800 prize. This was a casino record. Probably not coincidence that Larry, one of the poker room managers, offered to drive her to the airport.

I have never played Halo and don't play video games anymore, but this commercial came on a couple nights ago and it was the best use of Chopin in a vid game commercial I've ever seen.

I'm off to the office.

On a Heater

Can't lose this month. Made more in my first 10 hours at the tables than I did all of last month, when my earn rate looked like I worked at Del Taco. But now I am winning every session. Live action no limit, online pot limit omaha hi/lo--doesn't matter, just ship it.

Of course I was due for a rush after Carolina John and Todd left town. Hopefully we can get more blog updates from Todd, or as he now has proclaimed himself, the "Pied Piper of Cool." Because as for myself I haven't been posting a lot lately and that will continue as I have started a new writing project.